HERCULEan Days
by Kami1
Summary: This is the Gohan torture fic! If you like Gohan torture you'll love this, as Dende decides to torture his friend with 5 field trips to celebrate Hercule Week. R
1. Prologue

5 HERCULEan Days

Gohan: This better not be a Gohan Torture fic, or you might end up in the next dimension.

Kami: You can't touch me, or else you might end up in hell. Don't you know that anyone who kills a kami is sentanced to an eternity in Hell.

Piccolo: That's only if the killing is unjust and if you destroy Gohan's life isn't it fair that he gets to destroy you.

Kami: Piccolo! Why did you tell him that ! He didn't know!

Piccolo: I'm just doing what's fair, Kami.

Gohan powering up to SSJ2: Kame...Ha...Me

Kami leaping off the lookout and fleeing the enraged sayajin: Well I guess it's time for me to go. See you all at the end of the fic... if I'm still alive that is.

Disclaimer: According to the Federal Copyright Laws, otherwise known as laws made by the rich to make sure they stay that way, we must include these wastes of space. Of course it doesn't require that we waste this much space, but... well better end this before you all get bored, so, um, I don't own DBZ, ok.

P.S. Videl doesn't know jack about Gohan.

The Announcement

For the first time in days, Gohan was truly happy. Unfortunately, for him, Dende was not. "Damn the kais. What do they mean, it's a contractual obligation to battle any evils that threaten the earth as a whole? I didn't see any of them drag their sorry asses down here to take on Cell. How was I supposed to fight against something that powerful? What gives them the right to take away my only vacation this decade? Well if I can't go to Disneyland, then I guess I'll just have to find something to amuse myself with down there."

Suddenly, Dende had an idea. Knowing his window of oppurtunity was only a few minutes, he quickly put his plan into action. "Gohan's life's never going to be the same," the young namekian god thought to himself.

back on earth...

History class was just ending and it was amazing how carefree Gohan felt. He'd been so tense that morning, sure that something terrible was going to happen to him, but there were only a few minutes left in class. What could go wrong (You'd think that by now, after all the tortures Frozenflower's put him through, he'd learn to stop asking that question, but alas Gohan's intelligence is balanced by a naivette and lack of worldliness that could only come from his father).

Suddenly, the principal burst into the room and with a quick apology to the geography teacher for interrupting her class, he started into an explanation of what their next week would be like: "As you all should know, next Friday is Hercule Day, a commemeration of our hero, Hercule Satan's incredible victory over the evil Cell."

"Ya, it certainly was incredible," Gohan thought to himself. "Incredibly phony!"

"Your class, since it contains Ms. Videl Satan, has been chosen to go learn about our hero all next week. You will first spend a day touring the Satan mansion, on Tuesday you'll be going to the Tenachi Boudokai stadium, Wendsday will be spent at the Satan City gym, the next day 3 martial arts masters will be teaching you all the basics of fighting, including the legendary Mr. Satan, so that the next day you will be able to compete in the annual 18 and under charity tournament held every year in the rings at the Hercule mansion. All money from the tournament will, of course, be going to the help make Hercule filthy rich, so you should all be happy that it's going to such a good cause.

"Did you hear that Gohan!" Videl whispered excitedly, "we're going to get a lesson from my dad! Isn't that amazing Gohan!"

"Ya, that's great Videl," Gohan said wearily, clearly not to enthusiastic about the whole idea.

"Gohan! Don't you even care!" Videl practically screamed, leaving Gohan with his incredible hearing, muttering about the stupid banshee woman under his breath.

"What's that Gohan?" Videl asked imperiously, knashing her teeth. "Is my presence a burden on you?" 

Before Gohan could mumble some pitiful excuse, Sharper cut in cooly, " Don't worry about it Videl. Nerd boy's probably just trying to find a way out of fighting because he knows any real man like me'd cream him.

With that, the bell rang and a very pissed off Gohan decided that it was time to have a little talk with a certain little green man up at the lookout.

up at the lookout...

"Oh shit, Gohan is so gonna kill me," Dende whimpered to the former kami, cowering behind his throne. "Piccolo, can't you please take the blame for this one. Earth really needs a guardian and I'm too young to die.

"Sorry kid, but maybe you should have thought of that before you started torturing the most powerful being on the planet. You're on your own this time, Dende," Piccolo apologized, but knowing better then to get on a super sayajin's bad side. "Um... I gotta go now Dende... I've got to uh... meditate. See ya later kid," Piccolo said as he flew away from the lookout at top speed. 

"Gohan's gonna kill me. This is gonna be terrible. Please save me Kami. Wait, I'm Kami, Damnit! Oh please save me Rou Kaioshin!

Before another thought could even register in the kami's mind, he heard a voice calling him from outside. "Wait a second," Dende thought to himself suspiciously, "that voice is just too cheerful. Sorta reminds me the way Vegeta sounds right before he kills some baka humans, as he calls them. Oh Kami- damnit! I've gotta stop saying that- I'm a dead Namek.

"Hey Dende," Gohan chimed in, with that way too cheerful voice, "I've got something really neat to show you."

At that, the young god decided there was no more reason to prolong the inevitable, he snapped his fingers, prompting a funeral dirge to begin and slowly marched toward the young demi-sayajin.

"Don't look so down, Dende," Gohan chirped happily. "It's not like I'm gonna kill you or anything," Gohan said with a look that said, "yet." "I'm just hear to deliver a threat. You see," the demi-sayajin continued, gesturing towards a book in his hands, "This book is a relic that belonged to a powerful alien magician named Garlic Jr. He didn't like earth's former kami much, so while he was in the dead zone, the first time, he wrote this. He called it 101 Ways to Roast a Little Green Namekian. Fortunately, for Kami, I sent Garlic Jr. back to the dead zone before he could test any of these fabulous recipes out and hasn't been heard from since. On my way here though, I noticed that a few of these actually looked pretty good, especially the Kami burgers, so I suggest that you stay out of my world for the next week, or so because trying to thwart the plans of scheming Kamis can make a guy pretty hungry. Clear."

"As Crysal," Dende replied, knowing he'd gotten off easy and already planning ways to get back at Gohan without the super powered demi-sayajin being able to guess it was him.

"Good," Gohan said. "Then I'll see you soon, but hopefully not to soon... for your sake."

Next Time on Dragonball Z: A familiar face is leading the tours of the champ's mansion, but is this a good thing? Find out next time on Dragonball Z!

P.S. Please review!

P.S.S. I want to know which 2 of the following fighters you'd like to see teaching martial arts with Mr. Satan to Gohan's class: Goten, Master Roshi, Krillin, Nappa, Captain Ginyu, or someone else. Vote by posting a review with your choice in it, or by e-mailing me at kamipop. ya next time I update! 


	2. 2 Demi-sayajins, Mr. Shoe, and an Unwant...

Herculean Days  
  
  
Trunks: Mom can we play with the time machine?  
  
Bulma: Trunks, IÕm on the phone. You can do whatever you want as long as you stay out of my lab.  
  
Goten: Darn it! How are we gonna get the machine.  
  
Trunks: DonÕt worry about it Goten. All weÕve gotta do is levitate the machine out of the lab and weÕre ready to go.  
  
Goten: Wow, Trunks. YouÕre really smart.  
  
Kami: Good job you 2. As I always say, 2 surprises are better than 1.  
  
  
2 demi-sayajins, Mr. Shoe and an Unwanted Visitor  
  
  
As Gohan arrived at the Satan Mansion, he was surprised to note that even though he was 15 minutes early, everyone else in his class had already arrived. ÒGeez!Ó Gohan thought to himself, Òeverone must be really hyped about meeting Hercule to arrive this early. This house is incredible. ItÕs nearly as big as CC. If Mr. Satan can afford this he must be pretty loaded.Ó  
  
Suddenly, a white flash of light to his right distracted Gohan from his thoughts. ÒWell Gohan, itÕs nice to see you again. These 2 tykes have informed me that youÕve been looking for challenges. Well here I am. One big challenge, for you alone.Ó   
  
As Gohan turned at the strangely familiar voice, a spike of dread went through his body. ÒNo it couldnÕt be! Not him!Ó But it was him... Cell was here.   
  
ÒBut, but, youÕre dead.Ó   
  
ÒOh no! IÕm not dead! My counterpart in this universe may be, but in my reality, I destroyed the earth. Then these 2 wonderful children came to tell me that they knew someone who wanted a challenge and brought me here, to face you,Ó Cell replied with a sneer.  
  
ÒMy dad beat you once and heÕll beat you again,Ó Videl said with a smirk.  
  
ÒGohan, isnÕt this woman a bit young to be your daughter?Ó Cell asked with a cool smile.  
  
ÒWhy would I be GohanÕs daughter? IÕm the daughter of the most powerful fighter in the world, Hercule Satan,Ó Videl declared confidently.  
  
For the first and only time ever, Cell collapsed anime style and began rolling with laughter. When CellÕs fits of laughter ended he pointedly ignored the girl, but grabbing GohanÕs hand said, ÒItÕs time to go my boy,Ó and they both dissapeared.  
  
As Gohan dissapeared with Cell, all eyes turned to the 2 children in front of them. ÒWho are you and where did Gohan go?Ó Videl asked angrily, giving the death glare to Trunks, but Trunks simply shook it off and replied, smirking devilishly at his best friend, ÒDonÕt worry. I figure, itÕll only take Gohan a couple of minutes to beat Cell again and then heÕll be back to answer all your questions.Ó  
  
True to TrunksÕ words Gohan beat Cell in about 30 seconds and swiftly flew back to the Satan Mansion. When he arrived, he found that heÕd lucked out, as Mr. Satan had arrived with the tour guide and everyone had started telling Mr. Satan about CellÕs reappearance. He figured heÕd just casually stroll in and noone would notice him as they mobbed Mr. Satan, but he was about to find out that heÕd made one small miscalculation, as Goten seeing his big brother and flashing an evil grin in TrunksÕ direction yelled at the top of his lungs, ÒOh! Big brother youÕre back!Ó  
  
Suddenly, the entire crowd turned and seeing Gohan, immediately proceeded to run at him, bowling him over in their search for answers to their questions. As Gohan lay under the mob of people trying to get a word with him, he sent Dende a little message. ÒDende this mob had better clear off right now, or else IÕll be having Kami ribs for dinner tonight and suddenly the mob cleared to reveal one very annoyed Videl. ÒDamn you Kami. I prefered suffocating in the mob.Ó and then a little voice piped up in his head, ÒWell thatÕs what you get when you threaten Kami.Ó   
  
At this point Gohan had officially decided that things could get no worse, but suddenly he heard a voice from a past that heÕd rather keep buried. ÒWell, Mr. Son. I see that youÕre still too much of a punk to make much of a scholar. You must get it from that bastard of a father, who left you when you were 7. You still have not changed and will likely, like your father end up with a body full of muscles and a head full of bricks.Ó That was all Gohan could take and faster than the human eye, Gohan stood, holding Mr. Shoe by the neck and saying coldly, ÒNever insult my father again,Ó throwing the abusive old man roughly to the ground.  
  
ÒI donÕt think so, Mr. Son. I am in charge here. Today we will be splitting into 2 groups in order tour the house more efficiently. Gohan, you will be in my group and if you so much as charge up a ki blast, youÕll be expelled from Orange Star High faster than you can say boom.Ó  
  
Videl was astounded! In less then a minute sheÕd seen sweet, cute, easily intimidated Gohan turn into a creature so menacing that it sent shivers down her spine. She was beggining to suspect that Gohan was not what he seemed and decided that after school the 2 of them would be having a little chat. Until then, she had just one question, ÒGohan, whatÕs a ki blast?Ó  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Next time on Dragonball Z: The terrible tour begins and Mr. Shoe brings out the big guns. Can Gohan survive the tour? Find out next time on Dragonball Z!  
  
  
Just to tell you, I wonÕt be updating for 4 or 5 days because I have to go on a canoe trip with some baka humans.  
  
P.S. Review  
  
  
P.S.S. the surveyÕs still going on for the martial arts teachers. I think right now Roshi and Krillin are in the lead with Goten just behind, but that can easily change, so post your opinions on who the teachers should be. 


	3. Mr. Shoe Get's The Boot

HERCULEan Days  
  
Bulma: Kami! Please give me a way to get rid of Trunks. Dende, I need you.  
  
Kami: Thanks Bulma. Since you asked for my help, it is my duty as Kami to see that your wish is fulfilled. Here, I've got an idea. Try this. I'm sure Gohan won't mind having a few friends say hello.  
  
  
Disclaimer: I might be in charge of the whole planet, have powers far beyond the comprehension of any human, but King Kai still won't give me DBZ. Well atleast for the meantime I don't own DBZ.   
  
  
  
  
Mr. Shoe gets the Boot  
  
  
  
"Now class, I will be shpwing you the prototype for the newest and greatest invention in all of martial arts. This is the mark 1 Power Scouter. Though it will not be out on the market for another 6 months, Mr. Satan has managed to procure one for a measly 3 million zeni from capsule Corporation, leading some to believe thay he may be exercising his considerible charms on the head of Capsule Corp., Bulma Briefs."  
  
Before Mr. Shoe could even finish his explanation, a snort was heard from the back of the class. Mr. Shoe felt it was time to grill his former pupil. "So... what is so funny, Son Gohan ?"  
  
Answering with the first response that came to mind, Gohan replied, "I was just thinking of what Vegeta would do to Mr. Satan if he discovered that he'd been excercising his supposed charms anywhere near the so-called prince of the Sayajin's mate and on top of that I have to wonder how Bulma managed to peddle that piece of Sayajin garbage. The thing's almost 15 years old for Kami's sake."  
  
Gohan's flippant responses were begginig to anger Mr. Shoe, so with remarkable speed, for a human, he grabbed his whip and with a flash sent it flying towards the young demi-sayajin.  
  
With inhuman reflexes, Gohan snapped his arm up, faster than even Videl could follow and grabbed the whip 6 inches from his face.  
  
"Fool!" a small, yet muscular, black-haired man in spandex yelled arrogantly yelled. "How dare you insult my mate and then attack a fellow Sayajin, even if he is the spawn of Kakkarot. Do not worry. For these offences your punishment will be swift," Vegeta said, as, with a ki blast, he sent the former tutor to his death. "By the way, eldest spawn of Kakkarot, Trunks has recently been complaining that you never come to play, so the woman has instructed me to-"  
  
"Do you mean ordered with threat of frying pan, Vegeta," Gohan cut in smugly.  
  
"Silence brat!" Vegeta screamed angrily. "Anyway, the woman has instructed me to bring Trunks to your school to play with you and your baka human friends. Since you no longer have a teacher and Trunks is far more intelligent than any baka human could ever be, I'll allow him to be your teacher's replacement."  
  
"We don't want no stupid toddler ordering us around," A muscular young man in the front piped up.  
  
"Fine. Then I suppose my brat won't be teching you... because you'll be in the next dimension." Vegeta stated calmly, as, with a laugh and raising a finger he blasted the boy right to King Yemma's doorstep. "Any more objections?" Vegeta asked, grinning evily. After a moment of silence the prince of the Sayajins departed, flying out the window, with a farewell to his heir. "Have fun brat, but don't blast too many humans or else the woman might be upset and don't kill anyone named Videl because the banshee woman told your mother that she was Gohan's mate. Remember, our deal brat. If I feel that you've sufficiently tortured Kakkarot's brat at the end of today, I'll buy you an ice cream truck, otherwise you get the gravity room for disturbing my training. Understood?"  
  
  
  
Up at King Yemma's check-in station...  
  
  
"So, let's see then," King Yemma said, looking at a little notebook in his hands. "Turan Coon, eh. Weel you've got a decent record, probably enough to get you into heaven, but you aren't slated for death for another 69 years. How did you die !?!"  
  
"Well you see," the man in a Peppi's Pizza uniform replied. " There was this short dude with really funny hair that I was delivering pizzas to, but when I asked him for payment-"  
  
"Don't bother explaining," King Yemma cut in. "You're Prince Vegeta's 12th victim today and it's only 11am. Consider yourself lucky. The last guy who asked his royal pain in the ass for money, he was disembowled, sent to the current guardian of the earth to be healed and disembowled again before the Prince of the Sayajins saw fit to put the man out of his misery. Look on the bright side. As long as Vegeta's around, Earth will never have to face over population.  
  
  
Back at the Satan Mansion...  
  
  
Gohan, as usual, was cornered. "So Gohan," Videl angrily said, giving him the death glare, "Exactly what is a sayajin, who was that man and what did he do to our teacher."  
  
"Um... Well... I'll explain later Videl. I promise!" Gohan stammered, anxious to get away.  
  
"No Son Gohan! You'll explain now!" Videl commanded.  
  
But as the 2 argued, neither one noticed as 8 year old Trunks prepped his new time machine and zapped a significantly older version of himself into the room with them and with his arrival all hell broke loose.  
  
  
Next time on Dragonball Z: Videl get's the shock of a lifetime, as Trunks continues to play with his new toy and Gohan meets the Tenachi Budokai announcer. Next time on Dragonball Z!  
  
P.S. What's the Tenachi Budokai announcer's name?  
  
  
P.S.S. Read my other fics! They are atleast as good as this one, but because their not Gohan torture they get many less reviews. You can acess them through my author profile.  
  
P.S.S.S. The survey's still going on. Who will teach Gohan's class martial arts? 


	4. Beware of The Pan

HERCULEan Days  
  
Kami: Trunks! How could you do this to me! You've as good as killed me!  
  
Trunks: But you told me to torture Gohan and what could be worse than some guy from the future come and blab all his secrets?  
  
Kami: I'm a dead Kami. Better get to writing my will.  
  
Disclaimer: Hahahahah! I have gone back in time and stolen Dargonball Z. What do you mean I don't own it. I only own it in the Mirai timeline! That's not fair at all! Well until my next scheme reaches fruition, I don't own DBZ.  
  
  
Beware of The Pan  
  
"Gohan! I'm so sorry for not telling you before!" a purple haired young man apologized, breaking up Videl's interrogation, while trying less succesfully to break the grip of a love struck Erasa who was clinging to him, oblivious to the rest of the world. "I know I should have told you when I first started going out with Pan, but when I saw rule number 1 on your rules for dating Pan list, Pan will not date any players named Trunks Briefs under punisment of death by starvation, I didn't think you'd go for the idea." Turning to Videl he began an apology to her as well, oblivious to the clueless expressions of everyone in the room except Erasa, who piped up, "Who's the kid's mom Gohan and you never told us you had a kid?"  
  
"Mrs. Son," he began, as Erasa thought to herself, "Well that answers my question I guess, although how could Gohan and Videl's kid be going out already when they've only known eachother for about 6 weeks." "I am really sorry that your daughter is having a child and will understand if you tell her never to see me again, but we will see eachother with your permission, or not. I'll even take few blows from the frying pan if that's what it takes to convince you that I'm sincere.  
  
Simultaneously the 2 targets of Future Trunks'(not mirai) speech turned and simultaneously gave the demi-sayajin a tongue lashing, but not in the way he'd expected. Instead of a pair of ki blasts in his face, what he got was, "What are you talking about Trunks !?!" and "Did he just call me Mrs. Videl Son !?!" But before the confused duos questions could be settled, a sudden flash engulfed Future Trunks and he dissapeared, to be replaced by the worst nightmare of both of the remaining 2 Sayajins.   
  
"Kami help us all!" Gohan muttered to his little green friend up at the lookout, as he gazed upon an enraged Chi Chi, wearing a dark blue combat suit and wielding a half dozen frying pans.  
  
  
Up at Kami's Lookout...  
  
  
  
"Mr. Popo, do you really think Gohan's angry at me?" Dende asked.  
  
"Well he did threaten to kill you, so I'd have to assume that he is Dende," Mr. Popo replied emotionlessly.  
  
"But why would he ask for my help if he hated me?"  
  
"Perhaps he is giving you one final chance to repent before he shreds you up for a Kami Casserole, or some such."  
  
"Normally I'd help him, but this is just to good to be true. Fetch me a few dozen more Pina Coladas Mr. Popo. Maybe Gohan will take pity on me if he finds me in a drunken stupor."  
  
"It didn't help that time when you took away his mouth and he starved for 2 and a half weeks."  
  
"Yeah, but that was different. That was outright mean, while this is just a little practical joke."  
  
"But does Gohan see it that way?" Mr. Popo asked, but ignoring his friends pleas to have him stop torturing the most powerful warrior on earth, he turned his attention back towards the Satan Mansion, as usual ignoring 3 forest fires, a typhoon, a few hundred million starving children in Africa and a small scale nuclear war, in favour of his favourite passtime: watching Gohan suffer.  
  
  
Back at Videl's house...  
  
  
"Gohan!" Chi Chi screamed, as she struck him over the head with the frying pan of doom. "Where is my innocent little baby and that putrid prince who molested her?" When the only answer her son offered was a whimper about the unfairness of other kids not having to deal with pan wielding mothers, Chi Chi immediately began a systematic search of the Satan's household, from closets to trash cans, all the while cooing softly, "Come out Panny. Grandma's here to save you from that bad sayajin. Don't worry little one. Everything will be alright now that I'm here Panny.  
  
After about an hour of searching, Chi Chi's futile search for her grandaughter ended, but that by no means meant that Gohan was safe. Turning to Videl, she asked in a condescending tone, "After all I taught you and even the sacred knoledge held by only you, Bulma and I of the greatest of all Sayajin weaknesses, how could you allow your own daughter to be so horribly used by that despicable demi-sayajin player, Trunks !?!"  
  
"Lady," Videl screamed, much to the dismay of Gohan's sensitive Sayajin ears. "I've never even met you, don't have a daughter and have absolutely no idea what a Sayajin is, so would you kindly just shut your big, fat mouth! As for you Gohan," Videl began, while using a full power Satan death glare to quell any resistance to her words, "if one more person calls me Mrs. Videl Son, or even suggests I'm married to you, I'll beat you and them to a bloody pulp! For Kami's Sake! You're just a bookworm! I bet even Erasa could beat the stuffing out of you and my dad said that unless I find someone stronger than him, I can't even consider dating him!  
  
"How dare you insult my little?" Chi Chi began. "He's a million times stronger than your pitiful excuse for a father and the 2 of you have been happily married for more than a decade!"  
  
"Mom what are you talking about !?!" Gohan piped up, finally finding the courage to voice the question he'd had since the beggining of this whole arguement. He found it remarkable that he'd faced off against evil androids, space pirates and the greatest tyrant the galaxy had ever seen without even an ounce of fear, but crossing his mother still filled him with dread. "Mom, how can I have been married to Videl with a kid Trunks' age when I myself am only 18 years old?"  
  
"Only 18 !?!" Chi Chi thought outloud, seemingly quite surprised by this information. Then both Videl and Chi Chi slowly turned towards Gohan. One wielded a frying pan and the other a death glare and Gohan knew without a doubt that now that he'd allowed them to surround him, there was no power in the universe that could save him from their wrath. He could only watch in horror as the 2 tyrants screeched in the very same voice that had caused Vegeta to name them the banshee women, "Gohan! What the hell is going on here!"  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Next Time on Dragonball Z: Chi Chi attacks and Dende gets paid a visit from everyone's favourite universal protector, the Supreme Kai. The Mirai mayhem continues Next Time on Dragonball Z!  
  
  
P.S. Keep reviewing! The faster you review, the faster more chapters come out!  
  
P.S.S. The voting is still on for which to martial artists should teach Gohan's class, but don't worry even if your choice doesn't make it in, there are always other roles to play in HERCULEan Days.  
  
P.S.S.S. Read Chaos, or Star Wars DBZ style! All my reviewers have said they're really good!  
  
P.S.S.S.S. Have you ever noticed that the director and assistant director of the Sayaman Movie look exactly like Commander Red and Adjunct Red from the Red Ribbon Army? Strange, no? 


	5. Super Sayajin Bargain Sale

HERCULEan Days  
  
  
Pikkon and Goku: Hah hah! We are Pikkon and Goku and we've come to stop you warriors of hell from rebbelling!  
  
Cell: Why?  
  
Goku: You know Pikkon, he's got a point there. Why do we always have to save the day?  
  
Pikkon: Hmmmmmm... I must meditate upon that particular question.  
  
Goku: Yeah and I'm hungry! Let's blow this joint!  
  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ yet, but Freeza has promised to get it for me if I let hell break loose, literally. Sure, why not?  
  
  
  
  
Super Sayajin Bargain Sale  
  
  
  
1 week ago in the HFIL...  
  
"Lord Freeza," Zarbon said with a respectful bow. "The Sayajins have agreed to our temporary alliance as long as Vegeta controls the tree."  
  
"Fine," Freeza replied. "It is agreed. The Sayajins would not dare cross the Cold Empire. Soon the universe will again cower at the name Freeza! Muuwahahaaaaa!"  
  
"And the Ginyu Farce will once again terrorize with our terrifying poses! Hyaah!" the Ginyu's screamed, spinning on their tiptoes to end off in ballet poses that would put the Great Sayaman to shame.  
  
"Oh just shut up and you're the Ginyu Force, not the Ginyu Farce, though that name may too be appropriate for you 4 fools!"  
  
  
  
1 day later...  
  
"We have secured the tree, King Vegeta."  
  
"Good, Commander. Send the following demands to the Supreme Kai.  
  
  
At the Supreme Kai's Palace...  
  
"It appears my fellow Kais that in this matter we have no choice, but to accept the Sayajin's terms for the tree's release. I will arrange it. Agreed?  
  
"But what about Pikkon and Goku? Why aren't they being sent?" North Kai asked  
  
"They were um... unavoidably detained by an... um... incredibly sophisticated trap."  
  
  
2 hours ago in hell...  
  
"Hey Pikkon look!"  
  
"That's strange... since when do they have Mc Donalds in Hell?"  
  
"Who cares? I'm hungry. Let's go grab a few hundred Big Macs!" and with those words the 2 sprinted into the fast food shop."  
  
At the counter stood a short demon named Ranna who had recently been informed of the plan to escape Hell and was ready. "Oh wow you 2 are our first 2 guests ever and that means that you win our grand prize! You get as much food as you want, for free, for the next 48 hours!"  
  
"Wow Pikkon! We won! This is the oppurtunity of a lifetime! Let's eat!"  
  
"But Goku, what about saving otherworld?"  
  
"We can do that later! C'mon let's eat!" and before Pikkon could voice his suspicions that this was a trap meant to keep them here, Goku flew into the food like a whirlwind, filling his plate and a few dozen more full of food, while syaing, "Mmmmmmm, this should be a good appetizer," and started inhaling food at a rate that couldn't be to much below the speed of light."  
  
  
Back at Supreme Kai's planet  
  
"Well then I suppose we have no choice."  
  
"Agreed." the Kai's replied together  
  
  
Back at Videl's house...  
  
"Videl! What the HFIL are you sreaming about!?!" a booming voice came from above, as a tall, muscular man, with the biggest afro in existance quickly descended from the upper floors to end this screeching by force.  
  
Videl knew that she had only one hope for survival and immediately began to sob uncontrollably and to point at Gohan. "So kid, you were trying to hit on my daughter, well now I'll have to teach you a lesson.  
  
Incredibly, Gohan did not beg for mercy, but instead stood with a smirk so unlike the Gohan his class knew and loved and that Trunks thought looked more like something Vegeta would wear.   
  
"So you're not gonna beg. Fine," and with that the world champ lunged at Gohan, screaming, "Satan Punch!"  
  
The attack was only a blur to most of the class and the shockwave from it's impact stunned most of the room. By all rights the punch should have flattened, if not killed any ordinary kid, especially a nerd like Gohan, but when the class finally looked up they were met with an incredible sight.  
  
Instead of a disfigured corpse, Gohan stood before them unmoved, while their hero clutched his fist in obviously excruciating pain. "What the hell are you made of kid!?! I think I broke my hand on your face!"  
  
"You're lucky that's all you broke you weakling fraud!" a young woman with beautiful red hair and a stunning figure spoke up through the uncomfortable silence. "If this so-called delivery boy had even gone Super Sayajin, the charge-up would probably have been enough to break every bone in your sad excuse for a body."  
  
"Gohan! What is she talking about!?!" Videl entered the conversation, glaring daggers at her demi-sayajin pal."  
  
"Well... um... you see Videl... uh... Lime was a friend that I met when I was delivering stuff for my...uh... mom and I sorta helped helped her village and uh...yah."  
  
"No! I mean what's a Supper Satin?"  
  
"Um... well... I forget."  
  
Seeing an oppurtunity to cause some mischeif, Trunks spoke up innocently, but with an evil glint in his eye that spelled trouble for Gohan. "Oh that's terrible Gohan. Here let me remind you. It's sorta like this." Without another word, Trunks transformed, his hair spiking yellow with a blast of energy that sent everyone except himself, Mirai Chi Chi, and Gohan flying into the wall. Radiating power and with electric sparks flying around, he calmly said with a voice that spoke of authority and strength, "This is Super Sayajin."  
  
The little kid dimly reminded Erasa of something she'd heard a couple of months ago. "Oh my Kami! That little kid's the gold fighter!"  
  
"Nope," Trunks spoke up, pointing at Gohan. "That is the gold fighter," and before Gohan could stop him he hurled a huge ball of energy at Videl. "See!"  
  
With no other choice if he wanted to save his friend, Gohan blasted off, as if flicking on a switch he went SSJ and caught the ball with less than 6 inces to spare. Turning to Trunks he said with a cold smile that chilled the demi-sayajin prankster to the bone, "When this is over, it'll be me, you and Vegeta at 300gs for 6 hours. Got it," and before Trunks could apologize, or the army of fan girls approaching could get anywhere near him, he blasted off, taking a wall with him, as he left at inhuman speeds for a talk with his little Namekian buddy at the lookout at the realities of life... and death. If it got violent, well who cares. They knew where New Namek was, so Dende was replaceable.  
  
Suddenly he heard the one voice that was loud enough to carry around the world a dozen times. It was Mirai Chi Chi. "Gohan! What have I told you about flying through walls. When you get back home I think you and the frying pan of doom will be having a close encounter of the painful kind. Understood?"  
  
"Well if Dende really wants to die..." Gohan thought evily.  
  
  
Upon Dende's Lookout...  
  
Gohan stood atop the the Lookout, expecting Dende to rush out with pleas for forgiveness, so was surprised to find that it was Mr. Popo who first approached him.   
  
"I'm sorry Gohan, but Dende is in an important meeti-  
  
"Mr. Popo, tell me where Dende is now, or I will be instead forced to take my anger out on you."  
  
"Well when you put it that way... he's in the palace, but I suggest that you not disturb him. He's with the Supreme-"  
  
"Don't worry Mr. Popo. That's all I needed to know. Thanks," Gohan interrupted, ignoring Mr. Popo's warning and proceeded to blast the palace away with the twitch of a finger. "That should lure the little green slimeball out." But as Gohan looked up he was met with, not his Namekian friend, but a short purple-skinned man with a slightly singed gi and extreme anger in his gaze.  
  
"You fool! That was a new shirt too!"  
  
"But Shin," Popo inquired, "I've never seen you wear anything other than that shirt. You must have a dozen more. Your wardrobe's more predictable than Piccolo's."  
  
"That's not the point Mr. Popo! Now would you kindly shut up, or will I have tape it shut." Then turning back to Gohan, he said, "Child, if I ever see you again, you'll be lucky to end up in the HFIL!" But Gohan's response was far from what Shin had anticipated, as the demi-sayajin simply let off a mocking laugh and lifted his arms in a fighting stance.  
  
"Try me."  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Well what did you think? Pretty long, but that's cause I had to get a lot done. See ya next update and I'm sorry to the reviewer who suggested a Hororian, as the teacher, but I don't think I could write a character who's outlived the Supreme Kai and has practically unlimited power.  
  
  
Next time on Dragonball Z: The Supreme Kai and Gohan face off and the 2nd day of HERCULEan torture begins, but it appears that Hell has broken loose and is coming to earth, even worse guess who's teaching them tommorow? Next Time on Dragonball Z!  
  
  
P.S. Survey will probably be going till I write the chapter that the class get's taught martial arts, so keep voting.  
  
P.S.S. Review!  
  
P.S.S.S. I'm starting a mailing list so e-mail me if you want to be in. K?  
  
P.S.S.S.S. If you look behind Goku and Piccolo when they're announcing the rules for the punching machine you'll see General Tao, somehow healed of all his injuries. How did he not make it in? 


	6. Power of The Senzu Weed

HERCULEan Days  
  
  
  
Disclaimer: Don't own it, wish I did, but I don't so don't sue.  
  
Sorry that this chapter took so long, but I've had some serious writer's block. I've also been busy creating 2 great new fics: Field trip to New Namek and a one shot In the End. Well here it is, chapter 5:  
  
  
  
Power of The Senzu Weed  
  
  
In a flash, Shin charged up and flew straight at Gohan. The half Sayajin was ready though and dodged, jumping just beyond the Kai's reach and replying with a spin kick that landed solidly on the Supreme Kai's head and sent him flying through a solid wall.  
  
Slowly, the master of Gods rose to his feet and laughed. "Is that all you've got? I was expecting a good fight after all your talk."  
  
"Well I wasn't the one who ended up through the wall, was I?"  
  
"Good point young one, but I have a little secret. I learned this one from a friend of mine, Pikkon. Weight eliminate!" the Kai screamed, his power rocketing up to unimaginable levels.  
  
"So how much do you put on? A friend of mine does that to, but Piccolo only puts on 10 tons.  
  
"I wear 30."  
  
"Well then. I've got a trick of my own."  
  
"You must know that even the powers of a Super Sayajin could not defeat me."  
  
"Of course. That's why I'm going level 2," Gohan explained, as his hair began to glow.  
  
"Level 2?"  
  
"Yah!" Gohan screamed as his own power rocketed to levels well beyond anything the Supreme Kai could have ever thought possible (in my fic Gohan trained in the room of spirit and time for 5 minutes a week.  
  
Faster then the Kai's eyes could even follow, Goahn charged both his fists with ki and hit him 3 times, stuning Shin and with a thrust through his chest, sent the warrior rocketing to the ground, one stomach short of a full body. Eve though Kibito was there to heal him, he knew that he couldn't take another round with this kid and decided it would be best to temporarily retreat and putting a finger to his forehead, dissapeared.  
  
As the Kai fled, Gohan turned to his young Namekian friend, asking, "Uh Dende, what was the Supreme Kai doing here anyway?"  
  
"Oh he was just telling me about a small problem that had to do with Earth," Dende replied, thankful that Gohan's anger at him had lessened after the fight.  
  
"What is it this time? A galactic pirate, or let me guess some more androids... maybe it's another tyrant coming to say hi to my dad. Wait I've got it! A great warrior from a nearly extinct, evil species who wants to recruit some member of his family to help destroy the universe!"  
  
"Actually Gohan... it's all of those and none of them. You see... it appears that Hell has broken loose, quite literally and quite a few of it's denizens that have buisness to settle here are on their way."  
  
"Whaaaaat !?!"  
  
"But don't worry Gohan. The Supreme Kai assured me that he had his to best spies on the case. They're going to be inconspicuously infiltrating the Cold-jin headquarters and stopping its inhabitant's evil plans."  
  
"Did you get their names. Maybe we know them."  
  
"Of course, they're on a letter Shin gave me... oh yes! Here it is! Let's see... Oh Kami no! We're as good as dead. How could the Supreme Kai have been stupid enough to send that idiot! Here take a look," Dende said, handing the piece of paper to Gohan.  
  
The letter read:  
  
  
Dear Dende:  
  
yadda yadda yadda blah bah blah, but don't worry. We've sent to of our elite operatives to infiltrate the Cold-jin headquarters, without being detected. With Pikkon and Son Goku on the case, we've got nothing to fear.  
  
  
the next day outside the Tenachi Budokai arena...  
  
  
"Gohan!" Videl screeched, wielding her death glare with stunning ferocity. "You have alot of explaining to do."  
  
"Um... I don't know what you're talking about Videl," Gohan replied uncertainly with a classic Son scratch.  
  
"What she means nerd," Sharpner said with a cocky smirk that Gohan would have loved to wipe off his face, "is how you did all those tricks and where the gadgets are. We couldn't find any in Videl's house, so you must wear them.  
  
"The... um... gadgets... right... I uh... gave them to a friend of mine. Yah that's right! I gave them to a friend!"  
  
"So who is this friend Gohan? Would I know her?" Videl said, trying to catch Gohan in a lie and at the same time trying to pick up some info from the demi-sayajin if he was telling the truth.  
  
"Uh probably not. It's not like she's famous, or anything."  
  
So it was a she, Videl confirmed, storing the information away and was surprised to find that she was angry at Gohan for having other close female friends. "Or maybe they were more then friends," Videl thought, inwardly cringing, top her surprise. She was getting confused and one thing Videl hated was when a boy made her feel confused, so she decided to drill him even harder to make up for her feelings. "Why don't you tell me her name Gohan," Videl said gritting her teeth and tripling the intensity of her death glare.  
  
"You know," Gohan thought to himself. "If looks could kill, I'd be saying hi to King Yemma about now."  
  
  
  
at King Yemma's  
  
  
"So how did you get here little one? King Yemma asked a short monk who stood before his desk(No, it's not Krillin).  
  
"Well it was strange. I was talking to a tall green man wearing a turban and a long white cloak. I told him he was looking a bit green and asked if I could help him. He mumbled something about always looking that way and I started thinking that if looks could kill, I'd be lying on the ground pulseless, then his eyes flashed red and the next thing I knew I was here, being ushered in here by a pink ogre who told me I was dead."  
  
"Not again. Well atleast I know why Piccolo always laughed at that particular earthling phrase now."  
  
  
  
Back down to earth...  
  
  
"Her name is Bulma Breifs, not that you'd care."  
  
"What !?!" Videl screeched, making Gohan cringe in pain. "You know the Bulma Breifs, the richest woman on earth!"  
  
"Um yah. I didn't think it was that big a deal."  
  
"There's something strange about this kid," Videl thought to herself. "How can he possibly know Bulma Breifs and wait... maybe their involved with eachother."  
  
"Gohan. Are you involved with Bulma Breifs?"  
  
"Oh my God! Videl, you thought... hahahahahahah. That's the funniest thing I've ever heard and um no. She's a friend of my dad's. Geez. If I even touched her, I bet Vegeta would blow the crap out of me. Not that I ever would!"  
  
"Yah right Gohan! Like a little nerd like you could ever know the hottest woman in the world, Bulma Breifs."   
  
"Your lucky Vegeta's not here. If he heard you say that you'd be sooooo dead!"  
  
"Who's Vegeta?"  
  
"Before Gohan could answer, he began to detect a familiar presence and shot straight up as he identified it. "Dende, Kami, whatever you're called, if that's who I'll chop you up into so many pieces that even dad, with his instant transmission will be able to put you back together again."  
  
Confused, Videl asked, "Gohan. Why are you threatening Kami?"  
  
  
  
up at the lookout...  
  
  
"Like that'll stop me Gohan. I already assumed I was dead, or else I wouldn't be back on Senzu weed," Dende said to himself, thinking, "Ahhh... Strong enough for the Rou Kaioshin, but made for a Kami.  
  
  
  
outside the gates of Castle Cold-jin...  
  
  
"Pikkon! Don't you have any more food !?! I'm really hungry!"  
  
"Well Goku. If you hadn't eaten our supplies, supplies that were meant to last us both 3 weeks, then there might be some food for you!"  
  
Suddenly, a squad of Sayajins approached the duo of spies from the Grand Kai. "What are you 2 doing here? You'd better leave before we're forced to destroy you."  
  
"Oh... us! Well you see me and Pikkon are here to spy on the legions of Hell so that we can stop they're evil plans, but we're not supposed to tell anyone, okay. So don't tell anyone, got it?"  
  
Goku's speech had completely beffudled the guards. "What kind of an idiot is this guy !?!" was all the squad could think of as they opened fire on the 2 warriors of heaven, but Goku easily caught all the bolts of energy, as Pikkon started screaming at him angrily.  
  
"You idiot! We were supposed to come in undetected!"   
  
Watching the ease with which Goku blocked their bolts, they began to realize how outmatched they really were and the leader's last thought was, "So he's a powerful idiot then."  
  
  
  
back at the arena  
  
  
"What is it Gohan? What's wrong?" Videl asked, concerned at his motionless state.  
  
"Suddenly, a plane flew overhead, preparing to land. Looking up, the students spotted a strange looking capsule jet with 2 symbols on it's side. "I-I-It's the M1," Videl stammered, not awed by the plane, but instead the one who must be within it. "Th-Th-Th-That means that Muten Roshi, the Great Invincible Old Master is coming here!"  
  
"It really is incredible," the MC of the Budokai's said in wonder.  
  
"I know!" Videl giggled. "We're actually going to meet the second greatest teacher of martial arts on the planet!"  
  
"No! I meant it's incredible that he's still alive! The guy must be about 500 years old by now for Kami's sake!"  
  
  
  
back up at the lookout...   
  
  
"Oh Mr. Popo! This is some good shit you're missing!"  
  
"Oh no Dende! Don't tell me you're back on the senzu weed again! Last time Karin came over with the stuff you ended up spending a whole month in rehab. How did you get your hands on the most potent drug in the universe anyway? I thought that Shin obliterated all the stuff after he acidentally blew up that solar system under it's influence.  
  
"Oh shut up Mr. Popo, all 5 of ye."  
  
"There is only one of me Dende. I must assume that the rest are hallucinations," Mr. Popo said, not for the first time worrying about Earth's new guardian.  
  
"Then... is the Gran' Kay a halleciation te?" Dende asked, slurring half the words.  
  
"No Dende. The Grand Kai is here to talk to you about the welfare of Son Gohan."  
  
"You tell it like it is, my main man Mr. Popo. I'm here on behalf of his Supreme Kainess to give you a totally groovy speech about that groovy dude."  
  
"My word Dende," Mr. Popo said. "I haven't heard so many out of date phrases since last time you saw Scooby Doo."  
  
"Hey Grand Kai! Why don't you have a pipe o' senzu weed for old time's sake before you take away my powers. This is some seriously good shit man!"  
  
"Why not? I haven't had any of the stuff for a few eternities. I'm sure a few puffs won't hurt anything.  
  
  
  
5 minutes later...  
  
  
"Woah Dende! This is some good shit my man!"  
  
"Hey Grand Kai! What're you here for again?"  
  
"I don't know. I think it was something about you and Gohan."  
  
"Maybe Shin sent you to help me torture him."  
  
"No... I don't think so, but why not?"  
  
"Okay then I've got a great idea. Let's make a competition out of it. Whoever tortures Gohan worse gets to have anything they want from the loser. 5 tortures each. I'll start.  
  
"Sure. Why not?"  
  
"Okay ,Let's see you top this. I'll take away the whole class's inhibitions except Gohan's for the next hour and magnify all the girl's attraction to Gohan a hundred times. It begins now!  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Whew, that was a long one. As always, please R&R.  
  
  
  
Next time on Dragonball Z: When Gohan's class loses their inhibitions, he thinks things can't get any worse, but when the Grand Kai steps up to the plate and brings back an old enemy, immortal for 1 hour, can the demi-sayajin keep both his class and identity safe. Find out next time on Dragonball Z! 


	7. The Arrival of Radditz

HERCULEan Days  
  
  
My name's Dende and I'm the Kami of Earth and most unfortunately I'm running short on tortures I could bring upon Gohan so if you've got any ideas e-mail me, or include them in your reviews. You know I need to come up with 5 to beat that Grand Kai dolt so I'll take the 2 or 3 best 'cause I do have a couple of ideas of my own you know.  
  
  
Disclaimer: Damnit! Who knew Akira Toriyama could go SSJ, but he did and stopped Freeza in his tracks when my partner tried to steal DBZ. So I suppose I can still not claim to own DBZ. Darn it all!  
  
  
  
The Arrival of Radditz  
  
  
  
As Master Roshi descended the stairs of his private jet, he was immediately met by a seemingly endless crowd of students, all wanting his autograph, to know that one thing they'd always wondered about, or just wanting to meet the ancient master of the martial arts. In fact the crowd was never ending because the second he answered a question, or signed an autograph someone else would say, "Hey! Isn't that the Turtle Hermit. I've always wanted to meet him!" Unfortunately for Roshi, not everyone was quite so kindly disposed towards him especially a certain demi-sayajin named Gohan. Gohan was far from Roshi's mind however, as he was more interested in finding his good friend Capel (the MC). For some reason though, Capel was nowhere to be found. Fortunately, an ancient master of the martial arts had more resources than simply his eyes to use when searching for his friends. Ignoring all other sensory imput, Roshi felt around for his friend's ki, but this was not one of his brighter moves, as his senses were quickly blinded by an enourmous ki, extremely close too him and by it's erratic changes it likely belonged to one very angry demi-sayajin. Looking up he saw his second worst nightmare, his first being an enraged Vegeta, staring down at him angrily. "What the hell are you doing here !?!"  
  
Just as the martial arts master decided it was about time to commence cowering, a blessing in disguise appeared. It was Gohan's absolute worst fear, an angry Videl Satan! "Gohan! Why didn't you ever tell me you knew the best teacher of the martial arts in the world !?!"   
  
"Uh... I guess I forgot."  
  
"You know," Roshi thought to himself. "That girl is quite a looker and it looks to me like she's single, so I guess I'll just turn on the old Roshi charm and... hee hee hee..." But before the Muten Roshi could make his move, knowing Gohan it probably would have been his last, the girl just froze up right on the spot, just like every other girl in the class had for some reason and started shivering uncontrollably, as if her entire heart and soul was fighting against an evil spirit.  
  
Concerned, Gohan walked up to Videl and asked quietly, "Videl. Are you okay?"  
  
Suddenly Videl's eyes shot open, she relaxed and turning to the young demi-sayajin, licked her lips. "Now I am," she said, pulling him into a deep and passionate kiss. Though he fought valiantly against it, his Sayajin side chose just this moment to seize control of his body and returned her sentiments passionately, pulling her into it even deeper. Then suddenly his sensitive Sayajin senses detected a click... flash and the rolling of new film. In a flurry of movement, he spun around, only to discover Trunks and Goten both snickering behind his back about Gohan's new girlfriend, as they carefully held a dozen cameras. Each one had the kissing picture, as they called it, on it and Gohan knew that if Chi Chi saw even one of the pictures, he'd be as good as dead. Of course, Goten and Trunks knew that too, so before Gohan could even begin to react they were gone, in SSJ mode of course and Gohan knew that he would never catch up.  
  
Turning back towards Videl to apologize for his innapropriate behaviour, he was surprised to find her expression bereft of hatred, disgust and anger and instead she was doing something very unVidel like. The daughter of Hercule Satan was seductively swivelling her hips, as she slowly strode towards him. Seeking a quick escape, he spun around, only to find Angela and Erasa blocking his way with the same lovestruck look in their eyes that Videl seemed to posess. It actually kinda reminded him of the way he looked at food.  
  
Even though it would jeaporadize his secret, Gohan felt that his only remaining option was to take flight and he did, or atleast tried to, as with a scream he fell to the ground, for the first time noticing the tight grip on his tail. "Wait just a second," Gohan thought. "Since when do I have a tail !?!" but before the answer to his question could become apparent, he fell to the ground, unconcsious from the pain he had been feeling a moment before.  
  
  
55 minutes later...  
  
  
  
As Gohan slowly began to awaken he found himself lying beside Videl on a double bed. He had no idea how long he'd been out, but didn't really care. He had only 2 thoughts. He was undecided as to whether he should move closer to her, or run away at top speed. Fortunately, for him, the decision was taken out of his hands as titanium reenforced frying pan came flying out of nowhere to smack him across the head.  
  
"Gohan! I'm so ashamed that you could have become such a terrible delinquint! I know I said I wanted grandchildren, but first you have to get married!" his mother screeched, a mortified look upon her face.  
  
"Mom, I can explain!" Gohan said, clearly panicked, as he rose from the bed.  
  
"Fine then young man. How do you explain this !?!" Chi Chi replied, angrily pointing at a picture of Gohan and Videl's embrace of a few hours ago. As he saw the picture he gulped, knowing that this time there was no escape.  
  
As all of this was happenung, a very confused Videl was just awakening from the trance like state she'd been placed in to facilitate Dende's plans for the past hour. She wasn't sure exactly where she was, but wherever it was it was certainly comfortable. As Videl stretched out luxuriously she felt something strange beside her. It felt strange and when she looked up she saw in the same bed as her... Gohan? Then the memories came rushing back. The loss of control, the kiss, Gohan's tail and without so much as the smallest warning, the daughter of Hercule fainted, for the first and probably last time.  
  
  
up at the lookout...  
  
  
  
"Well Dende my man. That was some mighty fine torturing you did, but it can't compare to this!" and with that the Grand Kai snapped his fingers and Gohan Torture #2 began.  
  
  
in The Home For Infinite Losers...  
  
  
  
"974, 632, 120, 900... 974, 632, 120, 901... 974, 632, 120, 902..." a rather strong looking ogre counted, watching the exhausted spirit before him do yet another push-up. It was rather remarkable. This particular spirit was still going after 12 years straight of push-ups. Only 9, 765, 890, 234, 677, 898 more and he'd tie Bardock for the record for most push-ups in a row.  
  
As King Yemma went around the HFIL he spotted a familiar, long haired figure with a tail sprouting out of his behind and a face that sweated from more than a decade of push-ups. "How many is he doing?" Yemma asked one of his top ogres.  
  
"Oh well you see sir. We have an agreement with Radditz."  
  
"And what would that be?"  
  
"If he can do an infinite number of push-ups then we'll return his life to him, but since that is a mathematical impossibility, I've got a feeling that he won't be going anywhere."  
  
Suddenly they heard a shout from the Sayajin warrior's direction. "Hey! What the HFIL! I'm alive! Sweet!" and then the newly haloless Sayajin dissapeared in a blinding white flash of energy.  
  
"Heh heh," the ogre laughed uncertainly, looking up to discover a less than amused King Yemma staring down at him. "Then again. I could be wrong."  
  
  
at the Tenachi Budokai arena...  
  
  
  
Though he'd taken a few more thwaps from the frying pan of doom then he'd like, Videl was making an effort to completely ignore him and the entirewas staring at him as if he'd sprouted wings and eaten a couple of students, he made an effort to look on the brightside. The tour had so far gone without a hitch, there were only a couple of presentations left and Master Roshi had been so well behaved that he almost had to believe that the old guy was planning something. Besides, how could things possibly get worse then they are right now. By now you'd think that Gohan would have learned to stop asking that question, but hey, the kid got his common sense from his father. The reason he shouldn't have asked was that the second he did was the exact moment that his less then favourite uncle chose to make an appearance. Suspicious minds might even think that the Grand Kai planned it that way.  
  
"So nephew. How's your day been?" Radditz asked, trying to be cordial, but he didn't know that how his day was going was the one thing Gohan did not want to talk about.  
  
"Significantly better, until you showed up," Gohan grumbled, just as he felt the painful thwap of a frying pan smashing into his head full force, but when he looked up, he found not his mother wielding the greatest weapon of Sayajin annihalation known to anyone. "Videl! Since when do you have a frying pan !?!"  
  
"I really don't know Gohan. I heard you insulting your uncle and and got this sudden urge to tear the flesh off your bones and make a Gohan Burger out of you for threatening to make a Kami Burger out of me... Wait a sec. What the Hell am I talking about !?! Sorry Gohan. I don't really know where that came from, but when I heard you insult your uncle, I got angry and it just appeared."  
  
But Gohan was no longer listening. "Grrrr!" Gohan thought. "You're going to slowly roast for that one. Kami Burgers were too nice. I think a Kami Rib Roast would be much more satisfying. How do you make that one again Dende? Oh Yes. You simply rip the back bone out of the body and tie it back to the ribs. This is called a "French Cut." Then hmmmm... Bake at 325 F while stuffing mouth with Sayajin size portions of garlic, mustard and smothering with soy sauce then bake uncovered at 425 F until well done. Then remove from oven and Bon Appetit. You know buddy. It was bad enough when you granted my mother a hyperdimentional pocket for he private arsenal, but Videl. This time you've gone too far old pal. Who's next? Trunks !?!  
  
  
at CC...  
  
  
  
"Hey mom! Look what I can do!" Trunks yelled happily with a tinge of unbridled excitement ringing through his young voice.  
  
Bulma turned to watch whatever cute new trick her 8 year old boy had learned, just in time to see a pair of semi automatics appear in his outstretched palms. Though Bulma had seen alot, watching her child summon guns from nowhere was just too much for her and she fainted. To bad too because she missed her ecstatic son's next great achievement a moment later.  
  
"Hey look mom! An F18!"  
  
  
back at the Tenachi Budokai arena...  
  
  
  
"So um nephew-"  
  
"Don't call me that!" Gohan snapped.  
  
"Okay Gohan. Exactly what are we doing?"  
  
"We, as in my class and no newly ressurected Sayajin warriors named Radditz, will be watching some stupid movie about the MIB and some guy named the Seamen hunter, or something."  
  
"Well that's cool," Radditz replied, completely missing Gohan's not so subtle hint to go away. "But Gohan I think it says the Sayajin Hunter, not the Seamen hunter."  
  
"What !?!"  
  
and then the movie began...  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Dunh Dunh Dunh! Cliffhanger! Who could the Sayajin Hunter be? I'm not telling.   
  
Gohan: That's just because you haven't decided yet.  
  
Kami: Shut up!  
  
  
Next Time on Dragonball Z: The Sayajin Hunter is revealed and Radditz is not too pleased. Vegeta isn't to happy either. What's this !?! Master Roshi has a plan! All this and more Next Time on Dragonball Z!  
  
  
P.S. If you can guess who the Sayajin hunter is then I'll put you in my story.  
  
P.S.S. Plz reccomend some tortures for me.  
  
P.S.S.S. You will now go down and push the review button at the bottom of the screen. 


End file.
